I exacted my revenge. Death to the ants.

Unspeakable anguish met me when dad announced “Ope! Grab your lunchboxes, kids – the ants have returned!”

It is impossible to sufficiently describe how irked I was upon opening my lunchbox (which I had stupidly left unzipped, with an apple and a granola bar languishing in the bottom) and discovering a small but mighty and utterly repulsive army of ants.

They seemed to sense their doom was upon them, and proceeded to hide in the corners where they thought I could not see them.

Ah, what tiny brains they had. Tiny brains that were about to be scrubbed to their deaths with Dawn dishsoap and boiling hot water.

Reaching inside the lunchbox I took out the apple, shuddering to see the ants crawling over it. Suddenly I felt like they were crawling all over me. My wrath was soon to be poured out upon them, little did they know.

Once the lunchbox was rid of all food, I turned it inside out. I grabbed the faucet handle, cranked it to the highest heat setting, and sprayed it at the ants.

DEATH TO YOU ALL, my mind roared.

Then I applied the Dawn and the ants breathed their last.

My mom chuckled to see the vengeance in my eyes.

“I’m going to write a blog post about this,” I informed her.

And so I did.